RECENT POSTS

10 Reasons to Watch Team USA in The World Cup

Every four years, nations big and small, rich and poor, terrorist-y and non-terrorist-y set aside their real-world differences to instead battle for glory on the pitch. Even the US, despite never having won one, still vies for the coveted cup, and needs our support to help make it happen.

WNV Breaking News Alert

From WNV World News Headquarters in Boston, this is a WNV Breaking News Alert. Stay tuned for minute-by-minute updates from the WNV news team on this urgent situation that will undoubtedly affect millions.

WNV Hands On: iOS 8 and OS X Yosemite Betas

It's been more than a full week since Apple announced the newest versions of its phone and tablet OS, iOS 8, and its desktop and laptop OS, OS X 10.10 Yosemite. We've been using the first available betas non-stop since then, and we're here to show you some of the new features that were overlooked in the keynote demos.

Where's Waldo?

We took some time off recently in order to find ourselves. But instead of ourselves, what we ended up finding was a newfound love of Waldo, who, interestingly enough, also needed to be found. Today, we offer up one of our many, many solutions.

Freedom Aren't Free

A comic in which we ponder the NSA's protocol for profiling those that they deem necessary of targeted surveillance, and hope desperately not to end up on any special lists. Ah, who are we kidding. This whole site is just begging to be entered into evidence someday.

Spring?

Ah, April, the most emotionally abusive month. Giving us some-- wait. Didn't we do this already? I feel some distant memory of a hope long ago that winter had finally ended. How long have we been stuck here? I don't think I want summer, it will just be too warm. Yes, everything is perfect and frozen now forever...

Net Neutrality

H...hello? Is anybody out there? There's no way to know if you're receiving this, but I've got to try god dammit. The new Net Neutrality laws have already taken effect, and we're trapped in here, trapped with no bandwidth, a fate worse than the fires of hell itself.

The Nintendo Conspiracy

This game, much as Doom taught my generation to become blood-thirsty, merciless killers, is instilling the idea that drugs such as mushrooms help you get through life, thanks to the pusher known only as "Toad".

Inside Job

The bond between brothers is a sacred one, developing a closeness that many other people will never know in their lives. Sometimes... it's a little bit too close.

#BearFacts: STEEM Edition

STEEM Caffeinated Peanut butter is designed to provide a consistent release of sustained energy to help humans Get Going. But as the label says, it’s not safe for animals, and bears are no exception. Although it would be more accurate to say that Bears with STEEM are not safe for all life on Earth.

Press Release: WNV Acquired by Valve

Valve Corporation today announced that it has reached a definitive agreement to acquire Warranty Now Void for a total of approximately 1.4 billion. This includes 900 million in GabenBucks and 503.1 Dinosaur-Shaped chicken nuggets.

Baby Testing

It is time for science to abandon our subpar standard of clinical testing on animals and enter the golden era of testing exclusively on human babies. WNV's own Admiral Rau provides an insightful and compelling argument backed with pure scientific fact, or something.

Spring

Ah, March, the most emotionally abusive month. Giving us some distant hope that everything's going to be alright and the sun is coming to save us from the wasteland we've been living in, only to cruelly stomp on all our dreams. Again and again.

2014 Winter Olympics Update

The 2014 Winter Olympics are well underway, with the event everyone's been waiting for finally getting started: Unprovoked Invasion, and Russia is off to a commanding lead.

Eight Things We Were Doing Instead of Updating

It's been a while since our last post, so we thought we owed you all a bit of an explanation. Things around here have been very busy lately, and we haven't been keeping up with our previously rigorous post regimen. Here's a list of the ten most important things that have been keeping us from you all this time.

Letter to Editor by Vladimir Putin

Dear Comrades, I am Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin, greatest all-powerful democratic ruler of greatest Mother Russia. It has come to Putin's attention that Homeland has drawn criticism from West. Putin must set record straight.

Sochi or Fallout?

To celebrate the 2014 Winter Olympics, we've started playing a fun new game called "Sochi, or Fallout Wasteland?" The rules are simple, for each scenario, contestants determine if it happened in the post-apocalyptic video game series Fallout, or if it is currently happening in the very real city of Sochi, Russia.

Camping

We here at Warranty Now Void have been known to occasionally come up with ideas. Sometimes we describe these ideas as "good" or "great" or even "not likely to result in our horrific deaths." Oftentimes, we are wrong.

WNV Cares: Helping Lost Googlers

Every year, like twenty-ish people fall victim to Google's indifference, and instead of finding the answers they need, find themselves here on WNV, face-to-face with a poop joke. Today, we try to help those poor lost souls.

#BearFacts: Volume 2

Bears are quickly becoming one of the most important driving forces of the US economy thanks to the proliferation of totally accurate information by WNV's #BearFacts initiative. Not reading more #BearFacts makes you a terrorist.